Very good. I like this.
reminds me of things.
hmm..

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Tell me about how much you hate me.
Tell me with your fist.

Nice work.
Reminds me of myslef and my boyfriend.
check out some of my work and you'll see what I mean

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~jhxmt and ~fleet21 Separated at birth?
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A Life of Pain and Sorrow
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sounds good tome, I'll be sure to check out your stuff first thing in the morning, I'm a little beat right now to accomplish anything lol. Thank you for commenting on my work!!

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- Bridget Lewis

not a problem, I love reading otherpeoples work. Especially if my comments help them improve.

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~jhxmt and ~fleet21 Separated at birth?
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A Life of Pain and Sorrow
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yes it is very nice. I like the way it flows, its well I don't want to say catchy but like attractive the first lines draw you in to read the rest. Its also sorta uplifting rather than depressed and dreary but in a way that doesn't make you say icky romantic thingy. lol anyway. I enjoyed it.

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Welcome to my Heart.

you are a great writer, i dont know how to write poems, i just write what i think, plz go to my site someday so u can see what i write and how shitty it is, i have only like 5 deviantions because im new and im starting to learn about this, but i love your work and right now, i admire you! you rock!!!!

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You Hear Me When Im Calling, Lord You Catch Me When Im Falling, You Told Me Who I Am, I Am Yours

My Stock: ~Sanitarium-----stock
My Other Accunt: ~HereComesThePain

I really like the overall feeling this piece gave me. It reminds me of lying down and just relaxing with my girlfriend. There's just this feeling of comfort and safety that does honestly make each day alright. I think you really conveyed that well. Though, another revision wouldn't hurt.
The first four lines were great. They were really engaging and gave your poem momentum. I can see that you like to change up the tempo in your poems which is really good; But, with this one, I think the punctuation messes with the tempo your trying to keep. The last four lines brought it home, nicely.
I realize that this is more of a "raw" poem, if you will; And you might not have been aiming at technique. If that's the case, disregard the critique. Lovely poem, though. You have talent.


Thanks for the devwatch, by the way. You should comment some time.

Thanks for the critic!! I always need help with things your right 'I dont like the punctuation in it but then I thought it looked odd, from now on I'll sacrifice the look for the speed of the poem. You can count on me coming by as soon as I can to comment on your work I really appreciate the comment!!!

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- Bridget Lewis

reminds me of my Love. i like it alot! i must fave!

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All you need is love!